Blowin' Your Mind Like You Knew they Would

Psyched as I am to see the Chicago Bears play in the Super Bowl today, the 2006 NFC Champs just can't hold a candle to the goofy charisma of the Bears team that trounced New England back in '86. Though "The Super Bowl Shuffle" song and video were totally weak (at least in terms of, oh, lyrics, beats, choreography, production values, and rap music in general), there's still something endearing about the whole thing twenty years later. Not to mention something oddly enduring; Carole briefly worked with Willie Gault several years ago, and the two times I met him it took every ounce of personal restraint to keep me from busting the line "I'm as smooth as a chocolate swirl/And I dance kinda funky so watch me girl" in his presence.

Watching this again two decades on, Jim McMahon doesn't seem quite as obnoxious as I'd remembered, "Samurai Mike" Singletary looks and sounds like he was about 52 at the time, and there's something unavoidably gay about these guys boogie-ing around together in their tight white football pants. And speaking of gay, given the then-rampant rumors about Gary Fencik's sexuality, it's kind of mind-boggling that they had him do the line, "I'm on my man, one on one!" Hopefully, "The Hit Man" was in on the joke...

Anyway, Go Bearsh! We miss you, Sweetness...

Chicago Bears SuperBowl Shuffle
Uploaded by jeromeerome

ADDENDUM: As annoying as Jim McMahon unquestionably was, at least the "Punky QB" could throw two completions in a row. With the exception of Hester's opening kickoff return, the Bears were pretty unimpressive on every level; but the way Grossman was playing, you knew it was all over when the Colts went up 16-14. What a letdown. Guess I should retitle this entry, "Blowin' the Game Like You Knew They Would".

Comments

[Sarah Parker]

I'm so glad you wrote this, 'cuz I just saw the funniest shit EVER.
I'm here at the cheese shop, and just now, three grown men all dressed in Bears hoopla, are drunk as skunks walking (stumbling) down Western Ave. performing....the Super Bowl Shuffle.
Badly.

[moondog]

I hate you rex grossman. HATE. YOU.

[Chris]

Sorry about the result, but that's not why I am writing. I am from New England and the most humiliating thing about the '86 loss was the Patriots lame reponse to the Super Bowl Shuffle, "Bury the Bears". It made the Bears song look like a long lost Beatles track in comparison.

[Michael]

I love you man, but I loved watching Rex shit the bed, especially after he called the press "ignorant" among other things in response to their season-long criticism of him. Frankly, the Bears' offense would have done better if they'd exhumed Brian Piccolo and Sweetness and suited them up...

[hipspinster]

dude, that was a drag. can't argue with anything you said, although i admit i had a little more hope at 16-14. still, i had a bad FEELING!

hee. we listened to the super bowl shuffle right before kickoff. great stuff.

i hate peyton manning. HATE him! even when he is winning he looks like a pissy little whiner.

oh, well, i wasn't that vested in it. once the saints went out, it was like, "oh, well. hope it's a good game." which it, er, wasn't!

[Rabbi Adam]

Thanks for the vid. However, as ambiguous sexuality goes, this has nothing on the following year's Grabowski shuffle (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ryCzNpFVd_E)
And who can forget the profiles of Bears' athletes in Chicago Sun-Times with wide receiver Dennis MacKinnnon's odd admission in a family paper ("I like to be tied up").

[Dan E]

WTF?!? I completely missed the "Grabowski Shuffle". Rabbi, can you please explain to me what the hell that was about?

I also missed MacKinnon's bondage revelation, but that's almost as good as Dick Van Patton admitting (on a TV talk show) that he'd lost his virginity to a hermaphrodite!

[Rabbi Adam]

Oh my. I have nothing but envy for someone who will be seeing the Grabowski video for the first time. Do a YouTube Search under "Grabowski" or "Grabowski Shuffle" and you will find Mike Ditka leading what amounts to a Chicago version of the Village People--a hunky weightlifter, a moving man who's got the moves, a jackhammer operator, a slutty Bridgeport type all extolling the virtues of the Ditka work ethic complete with horrific choreography and more mullets than you can shake a hair extension at. Check it out and report back at your next confession please...Dick Van Patten? Really? And to think that there's more to him than being the uncle (or cousin?) to Salami on The White Shadow...